Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
