I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He shit in the fireplace
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
