What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
