Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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