Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
