on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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