How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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