Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize