too bad you live with your parents still
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
