I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
