This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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