dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize