very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
