we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
accomplished twins. life is a go
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize
