Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
