Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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