I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
