Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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