Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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