Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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