I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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