I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize