I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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