This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize