Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize