Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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