How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
