I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize