Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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