Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I want a musical about memes.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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