she is the kim kardashian of front butts
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
