Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
