Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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