Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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