i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
