enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I lost the right to judge tonight
Randomize
