My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Randomize
