There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Randomize
