Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
