Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You need a sexual gate keeper
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
