And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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