i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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