Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize