i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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