my sisters under your porch take her home
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I am available for nakedness
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