So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
