Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Randomize
