even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
