Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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