Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
