I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
